It Costs an Armor Leg
}} Elan demonstrates his skill at haggling. Cast * Haley Starshine ◀ ▶ * Elan ◀ ▶ * Durkon Thundershield ◀ ▶ * An Armor Merchant Transcript Merchant: Welcome to my armory tent. How may I be of service? Haley: I'm looking for some new magic armor. I get hit more often than a blackjack player facing a deck of deuces. Haley: I'd like to ditch these long leather pants and get something more appropriate to the desert heat. Merchant: You're wearing long pants? Haley: Yeah, I know. The way we're drawn makes it sort of hard to tell. Elan: For the first 100 strips, I thought I was barefoot. Merchant: Let's see... How about this one? Merchant: It offers superior magical protection from wounds and the heat. Haley: I like the desert color scheme... I'll try it. Merchant: Can I get you anything? Elan: No thanks, armor interferes with my class abilities. Merchant: Perhaps one of our magic belts, then? Elan: Oh! Well, I guess my pants can use all the help they can get staying on. Haley: What do you think? Elan: Um, Haley, I thought those were only for our private time. Haley: Four people on the street have accidentally addressed me as "young man" since we got here. I think some flaunting is in order. Durkon: Tha's na leather armor! Leather armor be stiff an' boiled ta deflect blows. Merchant: Of course, men's leather armor. Women's leather armor pretty much amounts to any attractive outfit that has one or more leather items in it. Merchant: I once sold a winsome young lass a leather headband that was more effective than plate. Haley: I'll take it. Merchant: Very good. That will be 25,000 gold pieces. Haley: I doubt this has 25,000 molecules in it. I'll give you 10 grand at most. Merchant: 20,000 gp, as long as you don't mind my children starving. Haley: I'll have the dwarf summon some food for them. 14 thousand. Merchant: 16,000 gp, and I'll dye your boots to match for free. Haley: Done! Haley: But dye these ones instead, OK? Elan: What just happened there, with all the big numbers and stuff? Haley: It's called haggling, honey. It's pretty common around here. Rather than paying the asking price, the buyer and the seller argue over what it is worth until they agree. Elan: Oooo! I want to try! Haley: No, Elan, wait— Elan: How much for this Belt of Charisma? Merchant: 6,000 gp. Elan: I'll give you 8,000. Merchant: ...Done. Elan: YES! I got it in one try! I am totally the best haggler ever! Durkon: Och, that's gotta smart. Haley: Nah, I included a fairly substantial "Elan Tax" in the initial budget for this shopping trip. Haley: Though I did expect him to spend most of it purchasing local bridges. Trivia * The boots Haley gets dyed are the lime green Boots of Speed first mentioned in #3, See Spot Spot, later in #573, Slumber Party and last seen in #608, Mean Girls. * The title is a pun on the saying "It costs an arm and a leg." * In the last panel, Haley mentions that she expected Elan to spend their gold "purchasing local bridges". This is in reference to a scam that began in the early 1900's, where George C. Parker conned people into buying the Brooklyn Bridge and other New York landmarks. This coined the common saying: "If you believe that, I have a bridge to sell you." External Links * 675}} View the comic * link|6862497}} View the discussion thread Category:To Girard's Gate